Top Ten Things Not to Tell Your Support Coach

Last night I posted the fake "Dear Jane" letter that I sent to my support coach Chris. Apparently it was a bit too realistic. This morning I awoke to an email and voice mail message from Chris asking about the message and whether or not I was serious. I called her to clear the air and let her know that I she is still the coolest (and only) support I've ever had, and that I am not abandoning her. After all, who could leave the support coach who thought this picture was hilarious:



Clearly, she has a great sense of humor. Unfortunately for her, it just wasn't as finely tuned as it needed to be when she got my email at 7:30 this morning. Next time I will make everything a lot more clear for her. Sorry Chris.

Tonight I thought that I would lighten things up a bit by posting Letterman's Top Ten List from last night. My Dad and I were busting up until they got to about the top two. That's the way the Top Ten List is though--number one is always the least funny. Here it is:

Top Ten Shows On The New Gay Television Channel

10. "How I Met Your Brother"

9. "Gary's Anatomy"

8. "Desperate Poolboys"

7. "Everybody Loves Raymond...Especially Steve"

6. "The King Of Queens"

5. "Not-So-Smallville"

4. "I Dream Of Gene"

3. "Gays Of Our Lives"

2. "My Name Is Earl And I Like Construction Workers"

1. "His Deal Or No Deal"

Not politically correct, but one hundred percent hilarious. Good Night.

My first Dear Jane letter

Tonight I had write my first Dear Jane letter. It wasn't easy to write, and it is definitely not easy to share with all of you, but I feel the need to be transparent with all my faithful readers. I wrote it to my now Ex-Support Coach, Chris. Here it is:

Dear Chris,

We have had some great times together, and you are much of the reason why I am as far along in the support raising process as I am. But tonight you said some hard things, and asked me to do some stuff that I am not particularly comfortable with. When we finished talking I just didn't have peace about sending out letters to all of my remaining contacts, so I went to my friends' house to talk about it. God is sovereign and good. My friend Jeff has quite a bit of experience and family history in missions, and apparently God brought us together for a reason, even if just for this night. For it seems that not only does Jeff possess missional knowledge, but other members of his family do as well.

So, I regret to inform you that I have found a new support coach. I know that in time you will forgive me and understand why I had to make this difficult decision. My new coach is Ben Brown. He is five years old and he goes to Beitel Elementary--the same school I attended. As I mentioned before, after hanging up with you tonight, I just didn't have peace about what you asked me to do tomorrow. I was explaining your demand to the Browns at dinner when Ben interjected. He said, "That sounds like a lame job. Don't do it anyways." I was floored. It was as if God's Spirit were speaking through Ben, his words nourishing my soul and guiding me like a pillar of smoke or of fire. I could barely muster a response, but I managed to say, "Ben, the LORD God has truly blessed you with an unmatched wisdom that is beyond your years. Surely you are the people and wisdom will die with you."

I know what you are thinking. You wish that Ben would have been alive when you started raising support. You are thinking of all the hours of sleep, streams of tears, and cartons of ice cream that could have been saved if only you had known of this Ben Brown years ago. Be comforted--God is the God of all comfort (2 Cor 1:3). Know that, "...for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose." (Romans 8:28) And, "...He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." (Phil 1:6) Please don't look on me with ill favor just because of the advantage that God has given me. "Has the potter no right over the clay, to make out of the same lump one vessel for honored use and another for dishonorable use?" (Rom 9:21)

My sincere hope is that this will not change our relationship at all. In fact, I think it will only make our friendship stronger. And I want to continue talking at our usual weekly time, so please keep it open. That is, if you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

Blessings in Christ,
Mike Gorski






Who couldn't forgive this guy!

Quick Thoughts on Good Intentions

So, I recently promised to find a certain quote from a Kierkegaard essay and this time I pulled through. The essay is called "To Will One Thing", and I was reading it at a very crucial time. While living in North Carolina, I was faced with the dilemma of trying to find a job without the usual connections from Church. Before that time, I had never interviewed for a job. In fact, I hadn't really ever looked for a job--they always managed to find me. Obviously, the job-hunting process was very foreign to me, but my shyness and anxiety in new situations made the process increasingly awkward. With each unsuccessful attempt at employment I lost a bit more of my motivation to continue on. You get the picture, it basically sucked. But throughout this period, I held on to one thing--the fact that even though I couldn't get a job, I still really wanted one.

Enter Kierkegaard. What a jerk.

I was gracious enough to read his essays, even though he isn't even alive, yet within the first pages of the first essay he was exposing my utter loserliness. There I sat at 3 Cups on Franklin St., drinking peppermint tea and telling myself, "Well self, at least you want to get a job. That's way better than being a deadbeat who doesn't want to work." Then I read this: "This much is certain: the greatest thing each person can do is to give himself to God utterly and unconditionally--weaknesses, fears, and all. For God loves obedience more than good intentions or second-best offerings, which are all too often made under the guise of weakness."

At that time, I was completely defrauded. My front of desiring to get a job could no longer blind my conscience. Before reading this, I applied for jobs with these caveats--"I'm just learning this process, it takes time and practice so I might as well ease into it"; "God knows my personality and that this doesn't come to me naturally"; "I've never lived in a city before, so I need to get used to it." But these were just excuses. I thought it was good enough to acknowledge my weaknesses and half-heartedly pursue my desires, and that God would turn all those weak ingredients into some kind of casserole that still tastes good even though it's just a bunch of random crap. Kierkegaard showed me that my attitude should be to give all of myself to God, including my shortcomings. And knowing that if I'm obedient despite my weaknesses, God will be more glorified than if I just say, "Well, God, I wanted to try. And that's what counts, right?"

Must...defy...laws of...physics!!!

In light of my last science hating post, I felt obligated to share a story from my amazingly...amazing life. I have been battling a cold (much like The Tick did once), and so I spent the day lounging around watching movies and TV. I rented "Bottlerocket", then happened upon an episode of The Tick. I love that cartoon. It's keen. Anyway, in the episode I watched, Tick reached into a black hole to pull out a doomsday device. While extending himself into the hole he said, "Must...defy...the laws...of...physics." To make a long story short, he was successful, and thus saved the universe. He also defeated the ever-intimidating infinity ball, which looks a lot like an 8-ball turned on it's side. Well, I better get some rest for tomorrow. Spoon!!!

Hi, I'm Mike...

Wow. It has been a long time, and I'm sure you have all completely given up on me ever blogging again. So, here is the one sentence recap of the last couple months. I'm still working at the gym (though recently cut down to two days a week) and raising support (I'm pretty far behind, please pray) while staying active in church through music, bible study and co-producing a Christmas extravaganza, all while staying sane by playing volleyball (and traveling to my first tournament) and writing songs. Whew. That was actually pretty complete. If you throw in a couple of movies, a lot of free meals, and season three of Arrested Development it would almost be a video blog--minus the video part. I guess you'll have to wait until my reality show starts. Patience.

I just got back from Bible study and a very long and interesting conversation about science. In case you didn't know, I think that science as we know it is completely bogus. That's where this other guy and I basically disagreed. We argued about it for at least a couple of hours and got nowhere except he got to hear me say that I don't believe in gravity. Then, he heard what I think is an equally plausible explanation for things dropping to the ground, namely, little tiny bugs that you can't see or feel, that are always pulling things down to the ground, so when you let go of something they finally succeed. Just so you know, I don't actually believe that. Maybe I'll post about it in more detail some other time. I'm a regular Mr. Wizard.

Support raising has been really hard for me the past few months. I've been kind of paralyzed by fear, and I think I stumbled upon a habitual sin of mine when thinking about it today. I'm paralyzed by a sort of lazy inertia. An object at rest stays at rest, right? I know, the guy who hates science just used a science analogy. So what, I'm a hypocrite. Anyway, I think the main reason I struggle with doing new or different things is that I'm just afraid to jump out there and do it. With raising support, I know I am doing it for a worthwhile cause, and that God is glorified even in the process. But since it is different, I have to constantly battle to go do it. With dating, girls, marriage, and all that stuff, I know I want that and even lust after the future possibility of a family, but I am completely unwilling to interact with the opposite sex (does anyone know a good mail order service?). It all brings up something that a Kierkegaard essay illumined for me last spring. The essay showed me that to have good intentions isn't enough. You can't say "I want to glorify God by getting a job and serving Him in that position." God is not glorified in intentions when they don't lead to something greater. I will find the actual quote I have in mind and post more on it tomorrow, but for now I will leave you with this one. "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." It reminds me of what Christ said in Matthew 7,

21 "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. 22 On that day many will say to me, 'Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?' 23 And then will I declare to them, 'I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.'" Whoa. The road to hell really is paved with good intentions.